Sorry, I know it's been a while!

Hello! Firstly, I am really sorry I know it has been a while since I posted, but I'm back so lets catch up!

It was my birthday on Saturday! I had a lovely time and I am so so grateful to my lovely family and friends, thank you!

So, where am I up to? So yesterday was October 15th, pregnancy and infant loss awareness, I know a lot of people took part in the #waveoflight campaign, in which at 7pm people around the world lit a candle in remembrance of the babies that were never met and those met but were lost far too soon. Me and Mr B lit our candle to remember our baby that was never born, but even though we never got to meet them, we still love them, they are always in our hearts and will always be close to our thoughts. It was such an important thing for us to do and I know a lot of people feel the same. Here is my candle, I would love to see yours if you also took part in the wave of light.

I posted this image on my personal social media page and it got me thinking, what if people didn't know we had lost out baby? What will people think? I am really not sure why I care so much, it is something that happened and out baby did exist. No matter how early in the pregnancy the loss is, it still happened and there was still a life inside of me, one that me and Mr B made. Even though it has been 2 years, I still think about our baby, what they would have been like, who they would have looked like and how it would have changed our lives. Yes, the timing wasn't perfect back then and the one of the only positive things I can take from the experience is that it happened, my body was able to make it happen and that means it can do it in the future. Our baby that we lost, proves that my body is able to create a life, with the help from Mr B, of course!

Without sounding too soppy, I just want to say that I love you, we miss you every single day. We know the laughter and love you would have brought to our lives and we know how much joy we would have felt to hold you and raise you as our child. All being said, you are safe, you are in heaven, you never felt the cold, felt sadness or upset, just love and warmth. We take comfort from that and I know that you are with me, every single day, in my heart.

So, today is Cycle Day 25! Still no confirmed ovulation from OvuSense, which is pretty annoying but I have got to remain in agood place. Usually I ovulate on Cycle Day 28, so we will see what happens! According to an app I use on my phone I ovulated on Friday 13th October! If I did, hopefully its lucky for me, rather than unlucky!

I want to do a full post on OvuSense, after I have completed a full cycle using it. But without going into too much detail, you need to buy one! Do your research, read reviews - it is all amazing stuff! By far, the best money I have ever spent, especially if it gives me and my husband our rainbow baby.

I am going to wrap it up here guys, I will post again in the next few days - I am out tonight at a Zumba class with a friend, so thought I would post before hand!

One final though to leave you with guys...

Take care, lots of love and baby dust to you all,

Mrs B x